Wednesday, August 13, 2014

Goodbye David, We'll See You Again.

Farewell to David

If you have been following this blog you will have seen that our focus recently has been our youngest son David. David has left us to be with God. It is a sad time, but there is also relief and gladness that his suffering has ended.



We do not know all the thoughts of the Lord; there are times when His greater plan seems to conflict with our prayers and even our understanding. We have never prayed harder then we prayed for David. We prayed for his healing, for mercy, for his life and sometimes even just a rest from his constant battle to breathe. God heard the cries of our hearts. He has answered and set us at peace, but not in the way we declared and believed.

Our website is leastandlast.com. I registered that domain more than a decade ago; the name comes from a revelation that our concern should be for the least and the last among us. It is the things we do for those who cannot offer us anything back that demonstrates our heart most clearly. We cannot give God anything He does not already have, yet He redeems and shelters us. We should do what we see our Father do.

When we brought David home he had been abandoned and left to die. A local man had rescued him and David found his way to us through a pastor. He had only been given sugar water for days. He was tiny, weak and filthy. We cleaned him and fed him and he was a happy and quiet baby.  We did not know he had a serious heart defect.

We knew that God had spared him and brought him to us against the odds; that he had destiny and a purpose.  A month later his breathing became labored so we took him to the hospital where we learned he had pneumonia and a hole in his ventricular septum.

David lived just 22 months and about 16 of those months were spent in hospitals. Anchalee was by his side for nearly all of that time, night and day. With four more kids at home it was a time of testing for all of us. When we searched God’s Word we frequently returned to Job, a book that had more and more relevance for us as David’s troubles increased.

Through this time we prayed and read the Word, and many people around the world prayed as well. We heard from God about other things, but never anything about David. This too reminded us of Job, when the Lord was silent through his trials.

Despite David’s hard fight, when the pain was not too great; he was happy. He loved his mom and dad. Always ready to give a big smile and a high five. He loved to be sung to, despite our terrible skills. When we ran out of real songs the alphabet song was the standby. He liked that one. Other nights when he was just too stressed we prayed him to sleep.

About a month ago a drug resistant lung infection had made his condition worse. We watched him pass out from lack of oxygen 100 times or more, only to see him fight back.  He fought like his namesake, he never gave up. But eventually the doctors became convinced that it was only the drugs keeping his heart beating. They asked if we would agree to stop the medicine.

I had prayed that there would be no decisions like this to make. Devastated we put David in God’s hands and allowed for the medicine to be turned off. Expecting to see him pass away, we were surprised to see his vitals improve. For the next three days he was stable.

Despite our optimism it was made clear to us that we needed to be clear about funeral arrangements. Anchalee had been through such a fight for this little guy, and it only ever got worse. She decided that she could not bear to see him lifeless; she could not bear to bring him home like that. She was actually voicing concerns about her own sanity. Because of this I supported her decision to allow the body to be donated to the hospital.

At home on the fourth day, we got a phone call, informing us that David had only minutes left. We asked what we should do? We thought we should go there. They told us no, it will all be taken care of and that we could not possibly get there while he was still alive (the hospital is 120 km’s away). We were told to come in two days to fill out some papers.

Once again we felt he was gone. We mourned and comforted each other. We praised God for allowing us to share David’s life, that he trusted us with his time on Earth. Two days later we went to the morgue to start the paper work. We were shocked to discover the morgue had no record of David.

We went back to the ICU and were shocked again to find that David was still alive.  They never told us that he did not pass away as they had expected. We no longer knew how to think. It was so confusing, so emotional that no feeling would express it. We wanted to be happy, angry, sad, it was so wrong to be put in this position. Bewildered, we went and spent time with David.

David looked tired but peaceful. He opened his eyes and recognized us. He smiled and he held our hands. Anchalee gave him a kiss, and he tried to speak in a soft little voice that I had rarely heard because of tubes in his throat. It seemed like he had something to say, but he had not yet learned how to talk. It sounded like “dad”.

We did not know was that David was telling us goodbye. He waited for us - he was ready to go and he passed away shortly after. His face was the picture of serenity, something new for David. And so we lost him for a third and final time. But things had changed.

The stress had lifted, we were OK.  Anchalee changed her mind. She wanted a funeral now, we wanted to honor him. And God began to open our minds to the beautiful thing we were part of. David had been alone, discarded; no future, no health, no love, no family. We took him in and showed him love. We dedicated him to God and sacrificed our peace, our plans, and our time to protect and care for him. He knew that love we had for him, he understood it. And when it was his time he was received by our Lord and all the pain he endured in this world was forgotten as he passed into the presence of God.

We did not see him run or talk or even sit up on his own. We do not know why his life was short but we feel that his mission was to prepare us for things to come. We have looked deep inside ourselves and swept out the corners. We have forgiven all, confessed all, and praised God regardless.  We have tested the mettle of our faith come out the other side strengthened. We have grown in compassion for others and have learned so much about the insufficiency of our own understanding.


David was the ultimate symbol of our vision to help kids who truly have no one. We covered him in Love and prayer and released him to God. We miss him, but we know this world had nothing for him that can compare to the presence of God. 

David,we’ll meet again
Kim



Final Comments by Anchalee



Dear all my wonderful friends in Christ; may the peace of the Lord be with all of you. We are sorry it took so long to get this blog done; it is just hard to do.
I would like to say this: Through David’s life I have learned so much. He brought so much to us; I don’t know where to start.
We thank the Lord for him. We thank the Lord that He has given us the opportunity to love on him; he was so special to us.
In my life I never really knew anything about heart problems. To experience this and to fight alongside David was a journey for all of us.

This is what I have learned:
1.       To understand those who face difficult things.
2.       That there are a lot of opportunities to help others and to be kind.
3.       I have examined myself about the things that I do - the motivation behind the service.
4.       So much about medical tools and procedures.
5.       To trust God even more.
6.       How important each of us is.
7.       Patience.
8.       Never give up.
9.       Don’t judge.
10.   Appreciate what you have.
11.   God is our source, our provider.
12.   Love.

 Also I am thankful that I could do this and realize all the time that Jesus has given me the strength.

I thank the Lord that my husband supported me through all of this, all the time encouraging me and ready to do anything that needed to be done. I don’t think many can do what you have done Kim.

And I am also thankful for our friends and family that support us with prayers and finances. We totally could not have come through this without your help.

In everything the Lord has a good plan. Romans 8: 28-39

We have matured; God is turning bad for good. He has worked within us, cleaned us up. We have been through the furnace and purified to be used by Him for His kingdom.

Things happen we do not expect, we don’t understand, but we have to trust God no matter how we feel, how terrible the situation. He doesn't make mistakes, He sees all, knows all. Many times in the Bible he doesn't do what we think He would do. Because He sees beyond what we see, He knows what is best; and we need His best.

David is gone but he is in the best place, with our wonderful Creator who made him and loves him more than we can. One day we will meet again – no tears, just joy.

Thank you Lord that we are still here and standing in You. We have hope and peace in our heart.

Anchalee


2 comments:

  1. A beautiful tribute to David. Losing a child is hard, but it's so lovely to see God's comfort with you. There are no words to say except you're in our prayers.

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  2. I can hardly see to type this through the tears. Thank you for sharing both you thoughts on David and how he has changed your lives. I am in awe of what transpired between all of you. How precious. How sweet. David truly had a mission and he continues to share it even now. I am so sorry for the emotional roller coaster you were put on. Hugs to you both. You are also in our thoughts and prayers.

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